Episode Recap: Amazing Race 10, Week 5

Episode: I Covered His Mouth, Oh My Gosh! Original Air Date: October 15, 2006 In this week's episode, the teams must catch a train from Hai Fong to Hanoi where they will try to catch a flight to Chennai, India. Oddly enough, it is illegal in Vietnam to buy airline tickets at a ticket counter in an airport, so the teams must find a travel agency before they can purchase their tickets. At least they'll be able to bring their toothpaste on the plane. As each of the teams leave the pit stop by taxi, we are treated to more deeply moving, heart-warming, painfully candid confessionals - or, as I like to call them, "filler". Rob and Kimberly (1st to leave) - Rob tells us that the Amazing Race is a metaphor for two people having a life together, and that he and Kimberly just need to "chill out". In this metaphor, what part of marriage does Phil Koegan symbolize? Peter and Bionic Sarah - Sarah tells us her feelings for Peter have changed. She doesn't hold him on a pedestal anymore. By the time the race is over, she'll probably view him as the dirt underneath the pedestal. Pretty Boys Tyler and James - Once again, James reminds us that he and Tyler are recovering addicts and that will give them strength to draw from to win this race. Will someone please give these two a medal for kicking their drug habits? Maybe then they'll shut up about it. James goes on to explain that the hardest thing about the race is that the contestants often feel powerless. He and Tyler have felt real powerlessness in dealing with their addictions, so that gives them an edge over the other contestants. Well, whatever "edge" they have, it sure isn't their brains. In an attempt to explain to the cab driver that they need to be taken to the train station, one of the boys draws a picture of a train. As this drawing is of such quality that any kindergartener's mother would be embarrassed to hang it on her refridgerator, it is not of much help. Kentucky Couple David and Mary - Dave tells us this is his chance to get out the coal mines and to take care of his kids. If he wins the million dollars, he can take his kids "to Disneyland, take 'em to the Grand Canyon, put 'em on an airplane." Hey, everyone needs to have dreams. Of course, there are other teams still in the race, but their personal and intimate thoughts are not interesting enough to waste air time on, let alone write about. The teams race furiously to the train station, which, surprise surprise, doesn't open until later (5 am), so all the teams end up on the same train. I think if I weren't blogging about this show, I'd just stop tuning in until fifteen minutes after it starts. That would give me more precious bathroom or sandwich-making time and I wouldn't miss anything. On the train, one of the Pretty Boys spots a man shooting up on the side of the railroad tracks. Since it had been a good five minutes since the last time these guys brought up their past drug use, this seems like a good opportunity to start this topic anew, "My drug use started when I was 15, just after my dad..." I don't care! Meanwhile, a loose alliance has formed between the Braniacs, the Single Moms, and the Kentucky Couple. In response, Bionic Sarah's boyfriend Peter tries to form an alliance with the Doublemint Twins. What is up with forming alliances on the Amazing Race? In the history of the show, has this strategy helped anyone? It's a race, for crying out loud! One would think the show's title would give this away. In order to mess with Peter's mind, one of the Braniacs pulls out a fake cell phone and pretends to book "the fastest flight" to Chennai. After seeing Peter get up to tell the Doublemint twins, the Braniacs and their allies have a big laugh at his expense. But their joke seems to backfire as it prompts Peter to borrow a real cell phone and get in touch with an actual travel agency. As a result, he and Sarah and the Doublemint Twins are the first to reach a travel agency and book flights once they arrive in Hanoi. This advantage is soon lost, however, when the Braniacs and a few of the other teams manage to book a flight that is scheduled to arrive in Chennai over an hour and a half earlier. Mary, of the Kentucky Couple, repeatedly asks her ticket agent if the flight she is being sold is the absolute fastest to Chennai. After receiving a number of assurances, she asks the man, "If somebody beats me there, what are you gonna do about it?" I don't think I'd want to get on Mary's bad side. Of course, that's assuming she has a good one. In any event, she and David land the flight that is supposed to arrive in Chennai at noon the next day, in other words, the later flight - unbeknownst to her. At the airport, the teams compare notes. Realizing they have the later flight, the Kentucky Couple and the Single Moms decide to race back to a travel agency to book the earlier flight. They manage to book flights to Delhi, where the connecting flight would depart from, but are only able to reserve, not book, seats on the flight from Delhi to Chennai. So, they have no guarantee that once they get to Delhi they'll be on that connecting flight Chennai. Upon hearing about David's and Mary's failure to get guaranteed seats on the plane out of Delhi, Peter and Bionic Sarah and the Doublemint Twins decide to take a chance and keep the flight plans they already have. This pays off for them. During a stopover in Bangkok, both teams are able to book earlier connecting flights that would put them in Chennai at 7:45am, an hour and twenty-five minutes before any of the other teams. While at the booking counter, Peter is disappointed to find the Doublemint Twins trying to book a flight without telling him. Yes, how shocking it is that Doublemint Twins would act this way. After all, these girls have played so honorably and unselfishly up till now. Incidentally, while in the Bangkok airport, we see Peter running from ticket counter to ticket counter while poor Sarah with the malfunctioning leg is pushing their luggage around in a cart while trying to keep up with him. Win or lose, as these two are standing in front of Phil, I hope Sarah dumps this loser on national television. It would be nice if she said something really humiliating to Peter, too, like, "... and all that hair on your back - not sexy!" Meanwhile, the other teams reach Delhi. The Kentucky Couple and the Single Moms still need to book seats on the flight to Chennai. Lyn and Karlyn are able to book the last available seats, leaving David and Mary in Delhi. David and Mary are later able to book a flight that will arrive in Chennai at 10 am. As scheduled, the Doublemint Twins and Peter and Bionic Sarah are the first to arrive in Chennai. Their next instructions are to find a bus station and take a bus 40 miles to some town with way too many letters in its name. The Doublemint Twins' taxi driver seems to know exactly the way to the bus station, as opposed to Peter's and Bionic Sarah's cabbie, who isn't entirely sure. As the cabs pass each other on the street, the Doublemint Twins' cabbie tries to yell some directions over to the other team's driver. One of the Doublemint Twins actually reach around and puts her hand over the poor guy's mouth. If I were that cabbie, I'd have to stop and wash my face. Besides, if I'm not mistaken, the Indian caste system categorizes foreigners as "Untouchables". That means this guy will probably have to do some ritual wrist slashing or set his own hair on fire or something (My knowledge of the Indian caste system gets a little sketchy in that area). Of course, none of that matters to Dustin and Candice, who would probably make their cabbie run over an orphan if they thought it would help them gain five minutes on the other teams. The Doublemint Twins manage to get on a bus that leaves a few minutes ahead of Peter and Bionic Sarah and are the first to arrive in the town with the long-winded name ("Mamallapuram" for those of you keeping track of this sort of thing). Once there, the teams must locate a specific arts and crafts store to receive their next clue. The Doublemint Twins are the first to find the store, but it doesn't matter since it doesn't open for another 30 minutes. Peter and Sarah arrive before then. Meanwhile, the Kentucky Couple arrive in Chennai at 10 am, putting them in last place at this point. Not aware of the two leading teams' earlier flight, David and Mary are comfortable in the knowledge that the Doublemint Twins and Peter and Bionic Sarah weren't originally scheduled to arrive until noon. Yeah, those Doublemint Twins and Peter and Sarah should be way behind! Ha ha, the fools! The arts and crafts store opens and the first two teams receive their clues to a "Detour" (a choice between two tasks). This week, the choice is between "Wild Things" (helping wrangle a crocodile) and "Wild Rice" (painting a complicated design with colored rice on the floor of a temple). Both of the leading teams choose "Wild Thing". Peter is already starting to whine, "This is going to be a long day." One of the Doublemint Twins has a concern about wrangling a crocodile, "I hope we don't have to, like, touch it's snout." So the snouts of strange taxi drivers are ok to touch, but not a crocodile's. At least the girls have their standards. In the mean time, the other teams are trying to reach the bus station. The Pretty Boys' cab driver gets lost and needs to stop and wander around on foot until he finds someone who can give him directions. Finally he's able to get directions and gets back into the cab. Why don't these taxi drivers know their way to the bus station? It's not like it's some obscure building hidden somewhere in town. One would think that's the first place they would learn after the airport and train station. On the other hand, it's reassuring in a way to know that Indian cabbies in America would probably be just as lost in their own country as they are over here. The Doublemint Twins are initially in the lead on the way to the crocodile ranch, but fall into 2nd place when their cab gets a flat tire. Peter and Bionic Sarah, who are all out of love for Candice and Dustin, tell their cabbie not to stop to help the other driver. At the croc ranch, Sarah once again is unable to hobble on her broken artificial leg fast enough for Peter, who keeps telling her to hurry up. They find their croc, and commence to wrangling, which consists of tying rubber bands around its snout while a couple of other guys sit on the critter. Peter is still barking instructions to Sarah, "Pull it tight, like your hair! No! Don't twist it!" Unfortunately, the crocodile does not reach around and bite Peter's arm off. Next, they help the wranglers lift the croc on to a stretcher, tie it down, and carry it to another pond. The Doublemint Twins arrive as they are finishing up. Peter and Sarah run to catch the next bus back to Chennai, but end up missing it. While they're waiting for the next bus, Sarah confronts Peter about telling her to run faster when he knows she can't. He responds that he's not asking her to go faster. Will somebody please rewind the tape so this guy can watch it? Sarah tells Peter she is not having fun with him. Wow, he seems like such a fun guy, too. The Doublemint Twins finish up and arrive at the bus stop to wait with the loving couple. They all end up on the same bus back to Chennai. Back in Chennai, the Brainiacs, Single Moms, and the Bickering Couple (Rob and Kimberly) arrive at the arts and crafts store and receive instructions for their Detour. The Braniacs and the Single Moms decide on "Wild Rice", while Rob and Kimberly decide on the crocodile wrangling. On the way to the ranch, Kimberly notices a cow standing in the street and asks Rob, "Is it a homeless cow?" In the course of painting their designs, the Braniacs and the Single Moms decide that "Wild Rice" will take too long. They leave to do the crocodile wrangling instead. Rob and Kimberly arrive at the croc ranch and finish way before these two teams. But because the busses only run once every 30 minutes, all three teams end up on the same bus back to Chennai. The Pretty Boys arrive at the arts and crafts store and decide to do "Wild Rice". Later, the Kentucky Couple arrive and also decide on "Wild Rice". Mary wastes no time griping at her husband once they start the challenge, "David, look at you making a mess!" In the course of this tedious task, David complains about Mary's choice for this Detour. "This is one of your pickings," he says. Mary shoots back, "What in the world would make you think that I would want to go wrestle a crocodile?" Meanwhile, Peter and Sarah and the Doublemint Twins have arrived back in Chennai. Peter and Sarah are the first to find the location of their next "Roadblock" (a task that only one team member may perform). In this case, their task is to obtain an Indian driver's license. They must sit through a Driver's Education course and then take a road test. Since this task requires no physical exertion or scaling rock cliffs, Peter, who has two good legs, volunteers. The Driver's Education class is held outdoors and is led by an instructor who looks like an Indian old Elvis, complete with dark glasses and poofy hair. He instructs Peter on the nuances of driving in India, including how to make hand signals for turning and demonstrates the proper way to honk a horn when there are small children or animals in the road. Peter passes the written exam and moves on to the road test on the streets of Chennai. As Peter drives, the instructor, who looks very frightened, yells, "Be careful! Watch out for the bus! Don't drive crazy!" Peter passes, however, and finishes this Roadblock before the Doublemint Twins arrive. Apparently, the only qualification for passing the road test for an Indian driver's license is that you don't hit a cow. From this point, the team must drive their driving school car 10 miles to the Chettinad House, which is the location of the next Pit Stop. Peter and Sarah are the first to arrive and win a complete home gym set, which seems perfect for these two. One of the Doublemint Twins takes her road test and is told by the instructor in the course of the exam, "You can not just drive the car like that!" It looks to me like the instructor has to shift gears for her. They are the second to arrive at the Pit Stop. Meanwhile, Tyler and James believe they've finished with the "Wild Rice" challenge, but are told they did it incorrectly, so they have to go back and finish their mistakes. Rob and Kimberly arrive at the training school. During the Driver's Education class, Indian Elvis tells Rob, "You must not drink and drive!" "Drink what?" Rob asks. Tyler and James finish painting their design and move on. David and Mary are still plugging away, at the challenge and each other. "I ain't goin' to put up with you sayin', 'I cain't do it! I cain't do it!' no more!" Mary snaps. "We coulda got two crocodiles by now," David answers. Finally they finish the task and leave the temple. "You gotta hurry," Mary tells Dave. "I know, Mary!" David and Mary don't arrive at the Driving School until after dark, long after everyone else has made it to the Pit Stop. Mary tells us she's proud of Dave, who's "strong and he's stubborn. He doesn't want to quit. I love him now more than I did the first day of this race." I'd be afraid to see how she treats someone she hates, or even just has a passing regard for, for that matter. These two are the last to make it to the Pit Stop. Fortunately for them, this is a non-elimination leg of the race. Also, they will get to keep their money and possessions, unlike in past seasons. However, they will be operating under a 30 minute penalty unless they finish in 1st place on the next leg. In other words, they must either finish in first place next time, or over 30 minutes ahead of the last team. This makes me wonder if the producers wait to see who is about to lose before they decide a certain leg is a "non-elimination" round. The Kentucky Couple are by far the most entertaining team in this race. It would certainly benefit the show to rig the race just a little to keep them in a bit longer. Next week - Friction between the Single Moms and Doublemint Twins, and camel racing!