Episode Recap: Beauty and the Geek - Season 3, Episode 8 REUNION SHOW

Episode: Beauties and Geeks Reunite Original Air Date: February 21, 2007 Ah, the memories. It seems like it was just last week... Wait, it was just last week! Yet, for some reason, CW expects us to waste an hour of our lives mostly watching old clips from this season of Beauty and the Geek. Probably 80% of the "reunion" show is spent reviewing footage we've already seen. For crying out loud, there were only seven episodes! What, have we all suffered short-term memory loss? It would be different if most of the show were spent filling us in on what the contestants have been up to the past six months since they finished taping this season. But maybe ten minutes at the most is spent on that. There are also a few minutes of "never before seen clips", but they aren't anything extraordinary. One particulary funny segment of the show dealt with the contestants' nightly confessionals in front of the camera. Nearly every contestant could perform at least one impression of someone else in the house. Nate had a pretty humorous impression of Drew, who evidently spent a lot of his time in the house trying to get people to join his investment club. I don't know if I would feel comfortable taking financial advice from someone in a Star Trek uniform. (Scooter tells us towards the end of the show that he does in fact plan on using some of his winnings to join Drew's investment club.) We don't get to see Nate's reunion with Jennylee until the last ten minutes of the show. They've kept in touch over the phone since the finale, except for two months which Nate spent in "another country" doing "research for school" (I don't know why he feels the need not to mention which country he visited. Did the whole country ask him not to mention them by name on TV? And what's this mysteriously unspecified "research", he's been doing? Does he work for the CIA or something?). It's obvious they still like each other a lot, but the reunion still seems a little awkward, maybe because it's in front of the camera. But they sure didn't have any trouble playing smoochie face in front of the cameras during the regular season. After a few minutes in the interview room, Jennylee takes Nate by the arm, and says, "Come on, let's go have some fun." And away they go. That's it. That's all we get to see of the big reunion between Nate and Jennylee. We spent the last two months of our lives watching this show for this. Thanks a lot, CW! Well, Nate and Jennylee were not the only two contestants in the house. Surely exciting things have happened to others in the house. Well, let's see, Megan got a little rat-dog. That's something. Actually, one exciting thing did happen to someone from the show. One contestant got married, and it is not who you expect. It was Mario! Super Mario said that being on the show made him realize that the "girl back home" was the one for him. This girl had been just a long-time friend of his prior to the show, but as soon as he got back, he asked her out. They got married not long after. At one point, Erin lists all the people she still keeps in touch with. She mentions pretty much everyone, and says, "That's everybody, right?" Not quite. One notable exception was Cecille. Cecille never changed throughout the entire show. But surely these past six months have given her time to think about her evil ways. And seeing herself on Television must have shown her just how much she needs to change. Don't count on it. She tells us every time she sees herself on the show, she thinks she's "funny". And the way the other contestants ended the show just proves how "scared" they were of her, and that they were "just jealous". Not one word is metioned during her interview regarding how she felt about her teammate Nate going behind her back and telling everyone not to vote for them. That seems like a pretty important question to have answered. Hellooo, producers! In spite of a disappointing reunion show, Beauty and the Geek remains my favorite reality show. My wife tells me it's because I probably relate to the geeks. That might be true to some extent. But I think it has more to do with the positive impact the show seems to have on the contestants (except for Cecille). Most contestants do seem to leave having grown as people, whether that growth is in the from of increased social skills, more self-confidence, or learning to appreciate people for who they are, instead of what they look like. You don't see that kind of payoff with other reality shows. The castaways on Survivor are often placed under so much stess that they are almost forced to show the ugliest parts of their personalities. In fact, backbiting, scheming, and manipulation are built into the game. In the Boardroom on The Apprentice, the candidates have no choice but to engage in character assassination of their fellow contestants just to survive. American Idol parades out the most delusionally untalented people so that they can unknowingly make colossal fools of themselves on national television, while Simon makes one hurtful, insulting comment after another under the guise of "being honest". The Amazing Race might seem innocuous at first glance, but how often do we see husbands and wives or long time friends reduced to yelling at each other? And it's all done for our amusement. These shows may go through peaks and valleys of popularity, but they are among the highest rated shows on Television. We are not forced to watch them. But we do watch. Human beings seem to enjoy witnessing the loss of a fellow human being's dignity. It's not hard to draw parallels between the audition episodes of American Idol and a couple of hundred years ago when the mentally ill would be put on display for the amusement of the general public. Ancient Romans would pack the Colliseum to see Christians and other helpless victims be hacked apart by gladiators or lions. Are we today much more enlightened? Would we still tune into Survivor if everyone got a long, The Apprentice if candidates were judged solely on their performance during the tasks and not on how vicious they can be in the Boardroom? Or would we even watch American Idol if only the talented contestants were shown, and Simon were nice? Probably not. The studios and networks know this, and so they purposely cater to the basest parts of our characters. Yet, Beauty and the Geek aims higher. Yes, the contestants are put through several embarrassing situations. And the footage is edited so as to glean the most laughs at their expense. But it is all done in good fun, not to humiliate anyone. There is no reward for insulting other contestants, or manipulating one's team mates. The contest is such that it inspires the best from the players, not the worst. A relatively modest cash prize is offered, but the ultimate goal is to improve as a human being. The contestants often say that it winds up not being about the money for them, but about personal growth. And I believe it. Sorry for the rant at the end. See you here next season.

Episode Recap: Beauty and the Geek - Season 3, Episode 7 FINALE

Episode: Beauty Queen and Geek King Original Air Date: February 14, 2007 Nate and the Bride of Satan return from the Elimination Room and join Megan and Scooter upstairs. Cecille is in the mood to celebrate, but can't understand why Nate is so sad. One would think it obvious that Nate is unhappy about having to say goodbye to his girlfriend, Jennylee. But in actuality, it would only be obvious to someone who has a soul. Nate confides in Scooter that he is also upset about Cecille's catty little comment at the end of Elimination (see the last post). Of course, Nate is far too passive-aggressive (read: "weenie") to actually say anything to Cecille about it. So Scooter decides he'll have a go at it. He gently confronts her and earnestly tries to explain the concept of other people having feelings, and sometimes it might help to actually consider that before we speak. Cecille responds, "I think I had the right to say whatever I wanted." I don't know why Scooter even bothers. It would be easier to teach my dog to eat with silverware than it would to make Cecille into a human being. Scooter deserves credit for trying, though. Cecille tells us later that she's glad Jennylee is gone. She was too much of a "distraction" for Nate. "Besides, I think he needs to spend more time getting to know me, his partner, than her." It's all about Cecille. The foursome gathers downstairs the next day to find out what's in store for them next. Host Mike Richards tells them there are no challenges today. They will each show their partner a hobby that they are good at, instead. Megan's hobby is tennis, so she takes Scooter to a tennis court and gives him a lesson. Scooter has never played before, so Megan dominates. Their match is interrupted, however, by a phone call to Megan from Anna Kournikova. Anna says she wants her outfit back. Cecille's hobby is hip-hop dance, which is funny. I think Casper the Friendly Ghost is less white than this girl. Anyway she takes Nate to an empty club and teaches him an entire routine. Who cares? There isn't a single viewer out there at this point who doesn't hope that Cecille loses in a big way. Some of us hope she catches a disfiguring skin condition as well. Why are the producers even pretending we give a rat's hairy patootie about what her hobbies are? Scooter's hobby is hiking. So he takes Megan on a trail overlooking Los Angeles. Megan says she doesn't get hiking. She tells us, "I don't understand the concept." Uh, it's walking, Megan, walking in the woods. Not too hard to understand if you really try. It's Nate's turn to show Cecille his hobby. He surprises her by bringing her to another empty club where his Star Wars band So Long Princess is waiting. It's cool that we finally get to see Nate and his band perform. The song they play for Cecille is called "Stormtrooper". Nate is a wild man on stage as he thrashes about and screams out the words to the chorus, "I'm a stormtrooper! I'm not a robot! I'm a stormtrooper! I'm not a robot!" Then he invites Cecille on stage to sing with him. A good time is had by all. Meanwhile, Scooter has a surprise waiting for Megan at the end of the trail. He has arranged for a picnic with bread, cheese, and wine. He says he wants to thank Megan for being such a great partner. Once back at the mansion, everyone buckles down and prepares for final Elimination. They are all pretty confident that they know everything there is to know about their partner, and figure that's what elimination will be about, just as in past seasons. But once they come to the Elimination Room, they find out things are not quite what they expected. Host Mike Richards tells them tonight's Elimination will determine who has changed and grown more over the past eight weeks. "But how do you gauge that kind of transformation?" He asks. He says that can't really be determined by a series of quizzes and challenges. So they decided to bring in a panel of judges. Then, he turns on the monitor to reveal all of the other contestants sitting in another room. Scooter, Megan, and Nate are thrilled to see everyone again. Cecille... not so much. In fact, she looks kind of pale at this point. What's wrong, Cecille? She tells us, "I was happy to see some of the people on the screen, but for the most part... none of them." Mike tells the two remaining teams that their next job is to convince their former rivals that they have made the most progess. The vote will be taken tomorrow night, so they have about 24 hours to make nice with everyone. Cecille tells us, "Our task is basically to kiss [butt]. I don't have anything to say to these people. I have nothing to say to them." The schmoozing starts immediately once the foursome rejoin the former contestants in the other room. A lot of the contestants who were eliminated early want to know what's up with Nate and Jennylee. Mario is one of those people and is particularly nosy about it. He tells us, "It's unfortunate that Nate has Cecille as a partner. I think for me my desire to see her lose might override my desire to see Nate win." Cecille tries to make up with Andrea and asks her, "Are you still mad?" Duh. The two girls go off and have a private conversation, in which Cecille tries to apologize without actually apologizing. She should be a politician, they have no morals, either. Andrea says she felt sympathetic "for like two seconds", then realized she can't trust anything that comes out of Cecille's mouth. Cecille later finds Megan and pouts about having to beg people to not to hate her. "I don't like any of those people," she says, "I don't want to have to explain myself to Sheree! @#$% ugly, mother ^$#@&* Sheree! I can't even stand to look at her! I @#$% hate her!" Later she cries to Nate about having "to be fake and kiss [butt]." Nate suggests that instead of kissing up, she try to be "humble". Yeah, that'll happen. The average human being might learn a lesson from this situation. That lesson being that you should always try to treat other people with respect, because you never know when it might come back on you. But that's a lesson a human being might learn. And Cecille's membership to that club has long expired. The next morning Cecille refuses to talk to Megan, for reasons unknown. Megan believes Cecille might be bitter now that there's a chance she might lose. Sheree is having breakfast with a couple of the guys when she sees Cecille walk through the kitchen. "Hi, friend!" Sheree says warmly. Cecille keeps on walking. Sanjay is putting a lot of effort in deciding whom should receive his vote. He has probing questions for everyone and even takes notes. "So," he asks Cecille, "why should I vote for you and Nate?" Cecille tries to explain how she's changed more "emotionally" than Megan has. But Sanjay isn't buying what she's selling. He tells us he doesn't see any change in Cecille since she first walked through the door. Cecille is still completely unrepentant as she talks to Nate about their chances of winning. She thinks the rest are just jealous because she and Nate did so well on the challenges. Nate actually manages to utter a word of disagreement and tells her she's wrong about that, how she's treated everyone is what is hurting them now. She doesn't budge. She says that all the talk about "change" is rediculous, and anybody who thinks they can change their lives in eight weeks is "rediculous". Nate responds by saying that the show has been a "life-changing experience" for him. She just laughs at him. To say that Nate does not enjoy conflict would be to make an understatement. He is no arguer. Seeing that Cecille is beyond help at this point, he does the only thing he can think to do. He goes behind her back and tells everyone not to vote for Cecille and him. He believes it's the only way to help her. If she wins, he tells everyone, that will send her the wrong message - that it's ok not to try to grow as a person. He's says he's willing to give up the $250,000 if it will help her see the light. As he later tells us of his team mate's unwillingness to change, "Maybe we don't deserve to win." It's time for final Elimination and Mike gathers the two teams at the bottom of the staircase. The former contestants will be brought out by twos to tell who they are voting for and why. Since everyone will be voting individually, the winning team will need seven votes to win. Jennylee and Niels are the first to come out. Nate evidently forgot to give the "don't vote for us" talk to his own girlfriend. So Jennylee stands by her man and votes for Nate and Cecille. The next five people vote for Megan and Scooter. Even so, Scooter tells us, "Still, we knew weren't out of the woods yet!" Scooter doesn't seem to realize he started this round "out of the woods." Matt is the next to vote. He says it's hard to gauge who changed the most, so he has to go by who helped him change the most. It seems he's still blushing about the time Cecille put clips in his hair and makeup on his face. He still thinks she was being nice to him. Clueless to the end, he votes for Cecille and Nate. Andrea votes for Megan and Scooter (shocker), so that makes it 6 to 2 in favor of Megan and Scooter. These two need only one more vote to win. Out comes Sheree and Pi. Oh, this is going to be good. Sheree sings the praises of Nate and tells Cecille, "You came in with a lot of power... and while it's nice to important, it's much more important to be nice." Then she compliments both Megan and Scooter, but adds, "That's why, Megan and Scooter, I'm sorry to tell you ... I won't be able to help you spend your $125,000!!! Aaaaaaahhhh!!!" This makes it unnecessary for Pi, Sanjay, and Tori to even vote. That's too bad. It would have been even nicer if it were 10 to 2 against Cecille instead of just 7 to 2. Oh well. So the series ends and everyone is happy. Except for Cecille, that is. She tells us in her exit interview, "Anybody who thinks they learned something by some nerdy guy, then those girls are as stupid as they look, pretty much." That Cecille, a class act to the end. Next week - Never-before-seen footage. Sneek peek at next season. The first reunion for Nate and Jennylee since the finale. And someone (not those two) has gotten married.

Episode Recap: Beauty and the Geek - Season 3, Episode 6

Episode: Down on the Farm Original Air Date: February 7, 2007 A realization hits Jennylee as she and Niels returns unscathed from the Elimination Room - they're in a contest to win money! She tells us it occured to her now that there are only three teams left that she and Niels might actually have a chance to win this thing. "I had forgotten all about the money," she tells us. Nate is happy about Jennylee's return, of course. He managed to make his move last episode, and since then the sparks have been flying. Just ask Scooter. He tells us he knew all along that Jennylee had a crush on Nate, but he never suspected it would get "physical". So he was surprised to find out that it had. "Physical"? Does this mean this isn't a family show anymore? Niels explains to us what he and Scooter consider to be "physical". He says, "I heard from Scooter, who heard it from Megan, who heard it from CC, who I believe heard it from Nate, that he and Jennylee did kiss." Alert the media! While Jennylee is getting her geek on with Nate in the other room (alternate joke: "getting geeky with it"), Niels and Scooter try to talk to Cecille about how she treats other people. She does not apologize for her way of life, and says she's proud of the fact that she only hangs out with the people who are among the richest 5% in the country. She says she's not going to hang out with "trash". Niels and Scooter keep trying to bring her to repentance, but it is to no avail. To use a Dr. Philism (don't judge me): "You can't change what you don't acknowledge". Cecille must acknowledge that she is the spawn of Satan before she can change. She tells us later that the rest just have something against "pretty people". She might have a point, if she were pretty. The teams gather downstairs the next morning to find out what their next challenge will be. Host Mike Richards tells them they will be working together on a farm, and they will be leaving in one hour. They all find what are supposed to be "farm clothes" waiting for them upstairs. But the clothing they find looks more like it came from the wardrobe department at Hee Haw. The girls are given an assortment to choose from, which means, of course, they all choose cute over functional. Cecille says it doesn't matter what they wear, because they could do farm work "naked". Yeah, naked farm work would be a lot of fun, especially when it's time to shovel manure. The teams arrive at the farm and race to a wagon containing three envelopes, which in turn contain instructions for their challenge. Their challenge is made up of three tasks: 1) Move five bails of hay from one spot to another. 2) Milk a cupful of milk from a cow. 3) Grab a colored tag hanging from the necks of each of five sheep. Niels has seen people on TV toss bails of hay around by themselves, so he figures that task will be easy. What he doesn't know that hay bails often weigh 80 to 100 pounds each, which would mean they weigh more than Niels. So he bends down to pick up a bail and promptly snaps off both of his bony, twiggy arms. ...or maybe not. But he's certainly not able to carry a hay bail by himself, so he and Jennylee tag-team the hay. Nate and Cecille finish the by task first after Nate pretty much does all of the carrying himself. This gives them a head-start on the cow milking task, and they need it. Nate does a decent job of milking the cow, perhaps due to his constant sweet-talk ("You're a patient cow, aren't you? Yes you are. You're a nice cow."). Cecille, on the other hand, is having trouble figuring out the procedure. Apparently, "squeeze and pull" are too many steps for her to wrap her brain around. Scooter and Megan finish the cow challenge first. This is in spite of the cow farting directly in Megan's face, causing her to gag. They get to the sheep corral long before anyone else and are able to chase down their sheep and grab all of the other teams. It looks like Nate and Jennylee will be facing each other in Elimination. Megan skinned her knee during the sheep challenge (which wouldn't have happened had she chosen to wear actual work pants instead of Daisy Dukes). While she's cleaning her wound and bandaging herself, Scooter and Niels decide that they are hot. So they take off their shirts and spray each other down with a garden hose. Suddenly the show turns into Geekback Mountain as we're subjected to the sight of these two in their cowboy hats hosing down each other's bare chests and backs. Later the gang is treated to a cookout with hamburgers and other assorted items straight off the grill. The conversation turns serious as everyone decides to discuss ways that Cecille should try to improve. When asked what one thing she would change about herself, she says she would lose weight. She doesn't really see the need to change anything else about herself, like, for instance, being the Antichrist. That night Nate and Jennylee sit by the campfire and discuss their relationship. Nate tells us he's concerned that once Jennylee goes back to the "fast-paced world of modelling" and is around "all the beautiful people", that he won't look so good to her anymore. But she tells Nate that she will never forget him, and says to him, "You're not a geek". He responds, "You are a beauty." Awwww The next day the teams are shown a video featuring how they were when they first came into the house. It becomes obvious to everyone that the only person who hasn't changed is Cecille. She points that out herself. Evil hasn't changed since the world began, why should it change now? As Scooter tells us later, "Cecille thinks that because she's cute, she can do whatever she wants and people will like her. But it's not true. People don't like her." Later, the teams prepare for the Elimination Room. Niels looks tense, so Scooter gives him a backrub. "Ah, I finally get the Scooter massage," Niels says, "It's everything I heard it was." I would write a joke about that, but I don't think I can top my Geekback Mountain line. The Elimination Room. The questions this time have to do with ranching, roping, and country music. Both Jennylee and Cecille answer their first questions correctly. Cecille easily gets her first question right, but then Jennylee is asked which animal mutton comes from. It's obvious from the look on her face she doesn't have a clue. But she takes a stab at it anyway and guesses "sheep", which happens to be correct. It's up to the guys. Both Nate and Niels answer their first questions correctly. Nate gets his second question right. Niels must correctly answer his second question to stay in the game. Mike asks him about the Chisholm Trail, which began in Texas. In what state did it end? Niels guesses California. The correct answer is Kansas. Niels and Jennylee will be going home. Everyone looks very sad, except for Cecille, who is all smiles as she hugs and pulls on Nate's arm, totally oblivious to his pain. Normally this would be the time when everyone tearfully hugs and says how much they'll miss each other. But that's what decent human beings do, and Cecille does not belong to that particular club. "Graceful winner" is not in her vocabulary, so she has to stop Mike Richards in mid-sentence, "I have something to say." Mike Richards looks right at her and says, "Shut up, you ignorant ho', before I slap the bleach right out of your skanky hair." ...actually, that's what he should have said. Instead, he tells her, "Go ahead." "You can take the blond to the ranch," she says, "but you can't take the bikini off the blond. And that was our major focus going in to this. We love it. We worked hard. We studied hard." Only Cecille can say something that both makes absolutely no sense, yet is somehow so unnecessarily cruel. "I'm going to be sick," Jennylee says, "That was inappropriate." Cecille actually tries to apologize to Jennylee when it comes time for the hugfest. But Jennylee refuses to hug her (who can blame her?). Instead, she hugs Nate and says, "She's so stupid." "Don't worry about her," Nate says. During the exit interview, Jennylee and Niels say the typical things about how much they've changed and how much they've grown to like and appreciate each other. Then Jennylee starts to talk about her relationship with Nate. She hopes they'll see each other again, but she doesn't know if they will. Suddenly Nate pops up and surprises her. He said he jumped out of a window and cut himself on a palm tree coming down. He says he felt so bad about what Cecille said and he had to see her one last time. One final time, everyone... Awwww You know you're wondering, so I'll tell you. Nate and Jennylee, who live on separate ends of the country, told TV Guide that they have kept in touch with each other over the phone since the show finished taping about seven months ago. Jennylee says she "still gets giddy" when she talks to him. Next week - The finale. The two final teams are surprised by a twist in the competition. The team that wins is the one the has changed the most. "But how do you gauge that?" Mike Richards asks them. Suddenly, they are shown something on the monitor. If I were to guess, I would say they bring back the other contestants to vote on who should win. If that's the case, it comes down to one question - Do they hate Cecille more than they like Nate?